Today was one of those days where I felt heavy and alone. I got through it, good job, ME!
I think God had designed my hell and I'm living in it. Heat, humidity, no electricity and really just fudged up day or days. Cooking in a hot day has to be the most dreadful punishment anyone can get. Heat from the atmosphere and the flames from gas are just enough to realise that you may be living in hell afterall.
Why do I cook in such heat you ask? That's because if I don't cook, I'll have to starve to death and I don't want that to be an option.
After I finished cooking followed by lunch, I started preparing to go for an event. This was the second place which gave me the feeling of living in hell because of just one person. She carries so much negative energy that I really dread to spend any time with her. On the plus side, I got to meet few really good women. Women who gave me hope for better days. I saw friendships, laughter, innocence and realised that these women are resilient. They live in such challenging circumstances but choose to stay in the present, stay grounded.
Their positivity was unfortunately not enough for me. Today just feels so damn heavy to carry. I feel alone although I'm married. My husband is a darling some days but other days not so much. He is a good man but then there are days when it just feels like communicating with him is a different kind of hell. Today is that day. Disappointments just keep stacking up. I'm just waiting for the day to end for a better tomorrow.
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